Junior High.

Today was my first day of being a Junior.

3rd year, bros!

I still can't believe it.

I can't believe that Summer went by so fast and I can't believe that I'm a Junior. I'm two years away from graduating and going to college. Heck, I don't even know what course I'll take. I pretty much convinced myself to take law but what about pre-law? I have not decided on that yet and they'll be asking us. I am not ready AT ALL. I feel so immature, I'm not ready.

And I'm in the pilot class.

Creme class! Star Section!

Last year, when they told me I was Top 1 in the class, I hoped that I didn't pass to be in the star section. I didn't want to be there; the pressure, expectations, & competitions but look at where I am now.

I love the part where everybody congratulated me, they were proud of me! But I also saw the posts on our group wall saying "It's us again but who's gone?" "I miss her!" I couldn't help thinking I'm not wanted. It's like they want the others more than me, well they DO want the others, they've been through a lot. I couldn't blame them from missing people but it's not my fault I'm here. I never even wanted to be here in the first place.

Okay, now for the real first day.

Same drill; wake up, take a bath, eat, then go. I was so worried though, I keep feeling like I forgot something. It was very traffic because all the parents are so excited to bring their kids to their first day of school. I wasn't excited.

It was another start of 10 months in hell. 

Okay, I thought about why I hate school, and I thought about how school is good for you. I think the reason why I hate school so much is because of the other things my school has. As in bad things, like how the canteen is so small and how there won't be any prom. I don't think I really mind studying as long as I strive myself to.

In the classroom, I had my best friend as my classmate which is awesome but these people have been together for 2 years so where would I place myself? The only person I really talk to is my best friend. I know these people, yeah, maybe I could call some my friends but it's so different. The most we get to say is hi. And yes, those friends were invited to my party but they don't talk to me. It's because of their bond. 2 years straight of being together. How could I fit in? They say I'm a friendly person, and maybe I am but I don't want to butt-in and join their cliques. It's just weird.

Other than not being able to fit in, I love my adviser. She's young and fun. Maybe she's strict but I'm not that scared because my classmates are all smart and maybe we won't get reprimanded or something. I don't know, it's my first time. The class sounds fun, they laugh a lot like the other sections. The difference really is that they're all smart and our lessons will be harder.

Overall though, my friends told me just to be thankful because I actually got in. One classmate also told me not to be scared because I wouldn't be there if they didn't know I couldn't handle it.

We'll see. I hope I do handle it.